Death by Traveling.

Death by traveling? Yes that’s right. Believe it or not, you can die from riding a plane or a car (& I’m NOT talking about crashes). What I’m talking about occurs on the inside of your body. The picture above represents what’s called a Pulmonary Embolism.

Traveling far distances means sitting for hours at a time, whether by plane, car, bus, train, boat, whatever. What you may not know is that sitting for hours is deadly. When you remain immobile for long periods of time (even in bed), the blood in your veins begin to clot, creating what’s called a thrombus. If the thrombus form in your legs (usually in the femoral vein or saphenous vein), it’s called a Deep Vein Thrombosis. It can form in your arms & pelvis as well. It just sits there until you begin to move again.

Then once you stand up or begin moving…the thrombus breaks off & begins flowing in the blood, creating a mobile clot called an embolus. It eventually reaches your heart…into the right atrium, through the tricuspid valve, down the right ventricle…then BAM! The clot blocks your pulmonary artery, preventing blood from reaching your lungs, & you deprive your body of oxygen. You eventually have difficulty breathing, become cyanotic (blue) from the oxygen deprivation, & eventually can die from respiratory arrest.

Even if the clot is so small that it still bypasses the lungs, it can still enter the left atrium, go through the mitral valve, down the left ventricule, up the aorta…& BAM! It can cut off supply to your brain or heart, causing a Cerebrovascular Accident (stroke) or Myocardial Infarction (heart attack).

Either way, it’s a terrible situation.

So my advice to you is this: If you’re a frequent traveler & go long distances by car, train, plane, whatever…don’t allow yourself to stay immobile for long periods of time. Move around as much as you can, stretch your legs, anything to keep that blood flowing & preventing these things from occurring.

‘Til next time.

Deuces.

WTF?! So apparently more than just animals are becoming popular plushies.

I mean because things like HIV plushies, Syphilis plushies, Herpes plushies, Malaria plushies, & Sperm cell plushies are normal to give kids these days >_>

Wow. Talk about eccentric & unique. Don’t buy these for kids. Maybe for microbiology professors ;)

‘Til next time.

Deuces.

Smoker's Lungs.

“Smoker’s Lungs” by soulpadd1.

My grandfather has been a chain smoker since he was 12 years old. I’ve never smoked a thing in my life.

For alot of people, smoking may be cool or helps them cope with situations. I can’t speak on their behalf since I’ve never smoked.

But you look at this picture & tell me…is it really worth it?

Those miraculous organs within our mediastinum bordering the heart.

Your lungs give you the ability to breath…to take in that oxygen & to feed our tissues with that precious element…that amazing yet complex physiological exhange of oxygen & carbon dioxide within our alveoli via red blood cells involving chloride & bicarbonate. All of that taking place in a millisecond.

To lower that ability & take it away is something I would never understand.

Think about it.

‘Til next time.

Deuces.

Know Your Roots...Mabuhay Ang Kulturang Pilipino.

Weekends like these are what I thrive for. Spending time with your family & remembering where you came from.

For me, being at the hospital constantly & going out with friends has been the focus for a long time. But finally having a family party brought me back to a level that I’ve missed…a level where you can sit back, look around you, & be so damn thankful of the family you have & the culture you come from.

I’ve missed Filipino food for the longest time. After losing 70 pounds & dieting like a nutcase, having some pancit, adobo, lumpia, bistek, & so much more comfort foods made me happy beyond words. I missed it so much.

On top of that, being surrounded by extended family that I haven’t seen in a while made it 10 times better. My family is my life & it’s because of them that I love my culture, know my roots, & am able to live my life in such a way that understanding where I came from allows me to be the person I am & has helped establish my role in the medical field.

I missed speaking only tagalog, & those long conversations with cousins, & those titas that spoil you to death, & playing hours & hours of mah jong until early hours of the morning.

Weekends like these are the best.

Always love your culture. Know your roots & love your family. Those are what shape you into the person you become & creates a legacy in you that will live forever.

Mabuhay ang mga pilipino. Mahalin mo ang sarili mong kapwa, kultura, at kasaysayan.

‘Til next time.

Deuces.

Mini-Ode to Microbiology.

I have many pet peeves. But one in particular stands out: When guys leave the bathroom WITHOUT WASHING THEIR HANDS.

I don’t give a shit who you are or how much of a rush you’re in…WASH YOUR DAMN HANDS! It’s idiotic not to.

Do some people not realize how many germs there are everywhere, let alone a public restroom?

I don’t talk much about microbiology in this blog, but it’s just as important medically as anatomy & physiology, pathophysiology, & many more are. It’s fascinating. These organisms are so microscopic yet contain the capacity to wipeout countries…& they have. It’s mind-boggling.

I think for me, working in the OR & in a hospital let alone has made me 10x more conscious & OCD of hand washing & making sure that I minimize transmission as much as possible. I find myself washing vigorously with loads of soap on my hands every 30 minutes or so. Hey…better to be safe (& sterile) than sorry.

Yes, yes…call me dramatic. But shit people. Don’t underestimate the power of bacteria & viruses. Take that extra 15-30 seconds & wash your hands…or even cover your mouth when you sneeze/cough.

I’m not an extreme germophobe or anything…but c’mon. No need to spread the germs. These microscopic creatures should NOT be taken for granted.

‘Til next time.

Deuces.

Wound Man + Southpaw FTW.

Here are 2 pictures that I came across.

For any student taking up medicine & thinking of entering into surgery & the operating room, the first picture known as Wound Man is a common sight in the medical books. Wound Man first appeared in surgical textbooks of the Medieval Times. It shows the many possible wounds a soldier could have during battle. It challenged the doctors at the time & gave them the thought: How would I fix this?

The second picture is a complete change of pace. It’s random. I personally think it’s funny because I myself am left handed. Being left handed was once thought to be a bad thing. That idea soon died for the most part. I’m proud to be left handed & I’ve met many surgeons who have an extremely steady left hand in the operating room. No worries. Southpaws for the win.

OR-philia.

After some thought & experience, I’ve come to realize that the OR is the shit. No joke. Literally, there are times when I feel like I live at the hospital & that a majority of my time & energy is spent there…& I love every second of it.

Yes, it can get very frustrating at times. Overwhelming as well. Especially in my department. There are days when it’s so slow you literally become conscious of every breath you take due to boredom…& there are those extremely busy days that makes an 8 hour shift feel like 8 minutes. It’s a bipolar environment that’s for damn sure.

But for me personally, the OR is a place full of adrenaline. Ok, maybe not AS MUCH adrenaline as the ER, but it’s a good balance. I love that rush. The rush you get when you observe & witness a surgeon perform his procedure. That satisfaction you feel when you care for the patient & they become so grateful. The joy of learning more & more as each day goes by. It’s an infinite amount of knowledge the medical field is.

I’ve had my fill of the other departments, & to be honest, nothing has given me the satisfaction & thrill that the operating room has. To be able to take a fellow human being, put him/her to sleep, take a scalpel, & fix the problem is nothing short of miraculous to me.

I’m grateful to be in this department. I salute all the surgeons, anesthesiologists, RNs, & the entire OR crew. We may be overwhelmed, we may be frustrated at times, we may get on each others’ nerves…

…but at the end of the day, we are the ones that give people hope & help save lives in a kick ass department.

OR rocks.

Now off to my family party.

‘Til next time.

Deuces.

Bonfire. Round 2.

Once again, SUCCESS.

Aliso Creek Beach. Anna & her court (most of them again), & her friends (new friends to me).

Pizza, a shitload of chips, some drinks, captain morgan, footballs, dolphins, a cool looking frisbee, marshmallow-only smores, nostalgia & laughter over our favorite old 90’s nickelodeon/disney channel/WB tv shows, bonfire…

…& BEST of all, random late night salsa dancing on the beach & on the sidewalk to the tune of Celia Cruz’s “La Vida es un Carnaval”, the song of Anna & her court’s salsa that I choreographed.

Yup. That’s us.

Awesome fucking night. We gotta do it again. No joke.

To Anna, Ian S, Luigi, Danielle, Alex, Natasha, Justin, Julia, Ivana, Vince, Ian F, Jennica, Geoffrey, & Avery…you guys are awesome…seriously.

…definitely another family to me.

Can’t wait ‘til the next reunion.

‘Til next time.

Deuces.


Anna & her Court (April 3, 2009 @ Wyndham Hotel, Costa Mesa)

Happy 1 Year Anniversary.

I'm a few days late on this as I have been busy with other things lately.

But I would like to say that it has officially been 1 year...since I began the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my entire life. Literally.

What I'm speakin of is diet & exercise. A year ago, I made the decision to take it seriously. I was sick & tired of being FAT. So I decided to save myself before it got any worse.

To be honest, the reason I let myself get that big in the past was not because I was lazy or that I did not care. On the contrary, I actually cared a whole lot. The only problem was that I had absolutely no time whatsoever. Full time student, work at a laboratory 4-5 days a week, personal shit that stressed me out to the max...it was a crazy time for me.

But now, since I don't need to take as many courses as I used to when I started college, & since my work schedule at the hospital isn't as demanding as the lab (even though the hours are so much longer), I have so much time on my hands.

It started off as working out & running 2 days a week...then 3...then 5...until I was able to do what I can do today:

6 days a week, running for 45 minutes & weight lifting for about an hour to an hour & half...& I do a whole body workout...every muscle group gets worked out well, including the heart.

On top of exercise, I implemented diet heavily. I cut down ALOT. Very light & healthy lunches, & if my mom doesn't cook, dinner is light as well...limited to no dessert, & no more eating after 8pm.

Most importantly...100% water. No soda, concentrated juices, etc.

Adding on to my exercise, my job itself is a workout. I'm on my feet nonstop for about 6-7 hours in the OR. It has helped me so much.

Overall, I've lost 70 pounds. My blood pressure improved DRAMATICALLY (going from 130/85 to 110/70), & I feel like a million bucks. I sleep better, I have more energy, & my self-confidence has grown a lot...something that has never happened.

I'm so proud of myself. And I'm thankful to God for giving me the strength & motivation to continue & to get better.

I have never received this many compliments in my entire life.

I got my neck back...& I intend on keeping it.

*pats myself on the back*

'Til next time.

Deuces.

Laparascopic Cholecystectomy, Percutaneous Endoscopic Gastrostomy (PEG), & MORE...

*VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED*

Laparascopic Cholecystectomy — Removal of gallbladder to treat gallstones or cholecystitis.

Percutaneous Endoscopic Gastrostomy (PEG) — Insertion of a feeding tube into stomach.

So I was called into the hospital yesterday morning &, surprisingly, it ended up being super busy for a Saturday.

Once again, I was allowed to be in the operating room during the procedure to observe more surgeries which included lap. chole’s, PEGs, & another lap. appy for learning experience.

On top of that, I was taught by the anesthesiologist & surgeon how to perform intubation & aided in putting a patient to sleep before the surgery. They love teaching & training serious students who are studying to be in the medical field, most especially those who want to focus on surgery.

Shit. Honestly, it was a medical geek’s dream. I was so very glad to have observed once again, learned a whole lot more, & was able to participate.

Freakin’ awesome experience.

‘Til next time.

Deuces.

Laparascopic Appendectomy.

*VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED*

Laparascopic Appendectomy -- Removal of appendix to treat appendicitis.

I was asked by my charge nurse in the evening if I would like to scrub in the O.R. & observe my patient undergo a Laparascopic Appendectomy.

Of course I said yes...hell yeah.

I was really glad & grateful to have observed this procedure being done laparascopically & firsthand on my patient the operating room.

Great learning experience.

'Til next time.

Deuces.

Bonfire.

Last night was nothing short of awesome.

Aliso Creek Beach. Anna, her debut court (most of them at least), & her friends.

For me, it was really great to see everyone again. It’s been over a year (or maybe more?) since we’ve all seen each other. The good old days of debut practice in her garage with me, my sis, & amanda as choreographers.

I always love reunions with good friends. Not only was it a reunion, but it was also an event where I met some pretty cool people as well. Plus a bonfire with an overload of food. I haven’t eaten that much junk in a seriously long time…& it was nice to live a little bit.

Hotdogs, smores, drinks (the parrot bay & absolute were bomb), being surrounded by awesome people…what else could you ask for.

Anna & her court are like family to me. As well as the other debut courts I’ve choreographed for. It was the kind of night I’ve needed for a while. I missed that group & I was really glad to have gone…

…& this was only round 1. Round 2 again next wednesday.

‘Til next time.

Deuces.

On-Call.

This weekend went by WAY too fast for me. I can’t believe it’s already Tuesday.

I think the main reason is due to the fact that I was on-call in the O.R. this past Saturday. Normally, I’m used to being off on the weekends, but due to a busy surgery schedule at the hospital, I was called in.

Honestly, I didn’t mind so much. Yes, it was short-notice & a last minute thing, since I literally clocked into work 20 minutes after I had woken up. Ergo, I woke up, took a really fast shower after listening to my voicemail, & got to work. I had a very slight headache since it all happened so fast & I didn’t have much time to do anything.

But I still was glad to have worked a few extra hours & made some extra money. Last week was just busy at work for me. But within that week, I met patients that, I believe, made me become more empathetic & compassionate.

I’ve always been that way, especially when working with patients that are enduring some of the worst illnesses & have undergone some painful surgery. In the field that I’m getting into & at the type of health & medical facilities like the hospital I work at, you really must have some kind of compassion for the people you care for.

Unfortunately, I’ve met so many that have lacked this quality. That’s one thing I DO NOT understand. I realize that at times, our patience for others gets kind of worn down & we get frustrated & tired. However, for those that work in healing others, there must be some ounce of compassion.

My philosophy is as follows:

Passion for medicine & healing. Compassion for those being healed.

Whether or not some agree, showing others patience, kindness, & compassion rapidly speeds up the healing process. Why? Because when they see & feel that the ones taking care of them are working their absolute hardest to heal them while at the same time treating them with love & respect, they fight & don’t lose hope.

And that, my friends, is EXACTLY the type of message you want to give them: DON’T LOSE HOPE.

Being called in this weekend was sudden, rushed, unexpected…but great.

Last week itself was awesome. With everything going on in my life, I feel that the numerous patients I meet & care for help me discover more & more about myself & because of that, I continue to grow as a person. The gratitude they show because of my compassion inspires me.

So, if I were to give advice for you today, it would be to show the people around you compassion. Sometimes, the smallest ounce of compassion can go a long way…it gives others hope…

…& it could even save a life.

‘Til next time.

Deuces.

Cadaver.

"Cadaver" by Skek

Nice shot. Reminds me of the good old days in Anatomy & Physiology lab.

The CORRECT Way To Perform Percussion.

Creepy.

What a trippy, creepy piece of art.

But I like it :)

False Alarm

This week has been great so far. The whole summer has been really eventful as well. I've grown to love work at the hospital more, more so as a place for me to learn & grow rather than just somewhere for me to earn money...even though, I must admit, that's great as well :)

Today, however, was going really well, until...it happened.

"Code Blue, GI...Code Blue GI..."

The GI (Gastrointestinal) Lab is in my department, which is Surgery & the Operating Room (OR). At first, me & the RN I was working with didn't hear the code, since the intercom in PACU is slightly weak (something that's dangerous & should REALLY be fixed). We rushed over there as soon as we heard the code, joined the rest of our OR team & were ready to assist in resuscitation. The crash cart was rolled in, ambu bags were out, defibrillator was ready. The Code Blue team from ICU, ER, Pharmacy, Security, & OR was united.

Then, a few seconds later, the patient stabilized. He had stopped breathing during his procedure & had a decreasing O2 saturation of below 80%.

Thank goodness it was a false alarm & he soon regained consciousness.

The adrenaline rush struck me & hit me hard, since I had just been with the patient & had been caring for him with the RNs minutes before.

It was just another example that shows me how short life is, & how it can easily be over in a few seconds.

I'm lucky & thankful to be alive...& to be breathing.

Thank you Lord for bringing that patient back, restabilizing him, & opening my eyes once again.

'Til next time.

Deuces.

Elite.

Talk about the ULTIMATE goal. The biggest aspiration. The elite.

Awesome shot & angle.

The Brighter Side of Life

It's 1am on a Thursday morning & I'm still up. As usual.

Yesterday (Wednesday) was a day filled with one word: inspiration.

First, the ability to dig DEEP within your brain to re-access knowledge & skills from the past that hasn't been used in years & being successful at it (despite doubts & honest fears of unsuccess) encourages & inspires one to keep on going & re-invigorates the spirit.

Second, going to work unexpectedly, caring for patients who are suffering from the worst possible diseases & medical problems, & STILL seeing an extremely positive & grateful attitude within them, is rare. And in those rare moments, one can't help but have a mixture of emotions.

For one thing, having patients like that is a breath of fresh air, since most of them have such a negative & discouraging outlook, understably of course.

In addition to that, it makes one re-analyze their OWN life to see how every single day, society complains about so many things, a majority of those things being so miniscule.

It makes you feel kind of embarrassed & ashamed, to be frank. If these patients, who are in the worst possible state the human body could possibly be in, STILL have a much brighter & more positive outlook on life, it makes you realize that we all sweat the little things & should be more grateful with what we have.

I am nothing short of inspired. And encouraged.

Life is something we should all strive to love & respect...

...& to also let go of the little complaints & have gratitude for being ALIVE.

I love what I do. This is what I live for.

To make myself available for the healing & well-being of others. And to become healed myself from the experiences I gain.

I am so lucky & thankful.

'Til next time.

Deuces.

The Healing Power of Friendship

Earlier this evening, I watched a movie that really touched my heart & made me depressed at the same time. It was a movie that showed the horrors of genocide while simultaneously conveying the underlying message that true friendship & caring for one's friends is not barred by background, culture, beliefs, & other differences that may divide them. At least that's my take on it.

The movie that I'm referring to is "The Boy in the Striped Pajamas". It's an amazing, eye-opening film somewhat reminiscent to "Schindler's List", in that it portrays the evil of the Holocaust. In a nutshell, the story revolves around the son of a Nazi befriending a jewish prisoner of the same age in a concentration camp. The two build a relationship & sort of "brotherhood" that, despite knowing their differences, remains unbreakable, even until the tragic end.

Not only did this movie move me in a way that both the film "Schindler's List" & the novel Night did, but it re-opened my eyes to the message that friendship knows no boundaries & that truly caring for others, despite certain issues, transcends above all.

I'm grateful that I watched this film. And I am also grateful for the friends that I have in my life. We may not all agree on certain things & we all come from different backgrounds...but at the end of the day, our friendship is what I cherish.

You all are my therapy & the healing that I need in times of difficulty. You keep me going.

If you haven't seen the film, see it as soon as possible.

'Til next time.

Deuces.

Two Suggested Books For The Student Studying Medicine

Here are 2 books that I recommend for any student studying in the field of healthcare & medicine:

Stiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers by Mary Roach

The Manual of Surgery by Alexis Thomson & Alexander Miles

I realize there are numerous books regarding medicine, but these 2 in particular are what I’ve read over the summer, & I really enjoyed them.

The former explores the world of human cadavers & reveals how many different ways they can be used, either in research, education, or experimentation for the benefit of medical students & society.

The latter is an older written text that dates back to the Victorian Age when surgery & medicine were experiencing great changes. Yes, it’s old, but it teaches the numerous ways surgery can be performed holistically & how various forms of injury can be dealt with…many of which have become the foundations for medicine today.

Two great books. I’m glad I was able to read them.

'Til next time.

Deuces.

From The Eyes Of A Migraine Sufferer

Borrowed from white coat

This is what someone would look like from the eyes of a migraine sufferer.

Crazy isn’t it?

Night Owls, Unite.

It’s nearly 3am & I am still up. And when I say “up”, I don’t mean I’m drowsy & attempting to fall asleep. I’m WIDE awake. I’m what society calls a night owl.

Basically, a night owl is someone who stays up past midnight & into the wee hours of the early morning. Other night owls like me usually work the graveyard shift or swing shift.

I can’t explain why I’m this way. People think I’m nuts, & understandably so. But for years my circadian rhythm has been all kinds of screwed up. It doesn’t help that I’m studying in the field of healthcare & medicine, which inevitably requires you to become a night owl.

Never been a morning person. I’m capable of waking up early, but you’d have to move mountains to wake me up, especially when I’m in deep sleep, as in Stage-4 REM deep.

Personally, I find a certain relaxing & serene quality during the night hours. When the moon is out & it’s light shines through my windows, I feel at ease. All the stresses, pressures, & annoyances throughout the day disappear, & I have time to myself to reflect & contemplate while all the early birds I live with are sound asleep. Even spontaneous night drives with the windows down give me a sense of peace.

I don’t know. Strange? Maybe. Oh well. I’m still awake. Might as well study…or read…or continue watching tv.

Night owls unite.

My question for you: Are you a night owl or an early bird?

‘Til next time.

Deuces.

Life in the O.R.

I've decided to update my blog weekly or bi-weekly since I suck terribly at updating. However, that gives me more stories to tell than if I updated daily. So we'll see how that goes :)

So in my last blog I stated that I finally am back in the workfield. This time in the Operating Room. And may I say, ever since I started, I've loved every single minute of it so far. This is my field...the area that gives me adrenaline & that allows me to gain knowledge that only so few my age can dream of learning.

Then again, this is me...probably the biggest medical geek you'll ever meet. Going into the hospital in scrubs & opening those double doors, the gateway into the OR, is such an amazing feeling. The fact that my peers include renowned surgeons & that I am part of their life saving surgical team awes me.

The best part is that I totally underestimated my position. Not only am I responsible for transporting patients to & from surgery in the OR, but I am also responsible for administering oxygen, monitoring/initiating EKGs, & judging from the OR surgery board which patients be brought down for surgery before others. The fact that I can finally call the admits "my patients" allows me to take a bigger step into my future career in medicine.

I love my job. Enough said. Despite the fact that there will be days of frustration, the pros outway the cons.

I'm proud to be a worker in the Operating Room.

The OR & the hospital is my domain...my sanctuary to gain knowledge & insight into the art of medicine.

'Til next time.

Deuces.

Giving Thanks For Mother's Mitochondria

We all naturally get our mitochondria & mitochondrial DNA from none other than the lady that struggled to carry us in her uterus for 9 months: our mothers. From the moment of conception, to the rupturing of our amniotic abode, to the Braxton-Hicks contractions, to where we are now...our mothers have been there, providing love & care.

I would like to apologize for another long hiatus. Not that anyone cares since no one probably reads this except for possibly one person. I know I'm not the best when it comes to updating & being consistent. But I've been busy like crazy with school, exams, & the hospital. And the best news: after a year of unemployment, I finally am back in the work field. I'm officially an Operating Room Transporter at Corona Regional Medical Center. I work in the OR with the surgeons & RNs & transport the post op patients to & from surgical floor & throughout the hospital. That definitely made my year.

This weekend is dedicated to our mothers. In my opinion, which is similar to Valentine's Day, we should be thankful & appreciate our mothers all year long. Yes, there are moments when we all possibly argue or disagree with our mothers. But that's just being human. At the end of the day, your mothers will always be there to love you. And so should you.

I realize that not all mothers & children are lucky enough to have great relationships. But if it weren't for them, you would only be a figment of her imagination. So be thankful for that.

Give thanks & be appreciative of your mother, your grandmother(s), your aunties, or any "mother-like" figure in your life.

A mother's love for her child is one that can never EVER be replaced or taken for granted.

Thank you mom for everything. For your sacrifices, your hard work, & your dedication to me & AC. Through the ups & downs, I love you with all my heart.

Happy Mothers Day to you.

'Til next time.

Deuces.

A Little Vino Rojo For Vasodilation

I had a small glass of Apothic red wine with my cesar salad dinner tonight. It definitely was quite relaxing & honestly made me rather warm due to the vasodilation of my blood vessels, causing an increase in blood flow & overall decreasing my blood pressure. In otherwords...I was hot. Red wine is actually very healthy & beneficial for you if taken every day, in particular the heart. All this of course ONLY in moderation & in small amounts. For men, about two 5 oz. glasses/day...for women, about one 5 oz. glass a day...in concurrence with daily diet & exercise. Lowering LDLs, raising HDLs, lowering blood pressure, & preventing cancer is never a problem in my book. Just don't get addicted & avoid cirrhosis by all means.

Anyways, today went well. It was honestly a very relaxing day. Being able to get honored for service at the hospital was a wonderful feeling. On top of that, who wouldn't be happy winning a free bottle of Apothic red wine. Eagle Glen has always been a sight for sore eyes.

Returning to class seemed normal. The rain ruined my plans for a second work out today, but it still made me feel relaxed & at ease, on top of the wine & salad.

Finally, to sum up, what made my day was my brief yet exciting conversation with a special person on facebook :) It was exciting for ME of course. I've missed this good friend of mine & I was happy to have caught up, even if it wasn't for very long. Hopefully soon we get the chance to catch up much longer. Thanks for taking the time to conversate with me miss Ephraim & Gomer.

Overall...a great day. Let's keep the rest of the week that way shall we?

'Til next time.

Deuces.


"Red Red Wine" by Delacorr

Neoplasia

A proliferation of abnormality.

Definitely a word that best describes alot of events going on within my life as of now. Mind you, this doesn't include school at all. In fact, my academic life is normal & actually amazing. I'm enjoying all the medical information I'm learning & I absolutely love it. My education has always been kept out of harm's way (knock on wood).

Outside of school is a different story. I feel that God is definitely giving me obstacles to overcome & to endure. Not that He hasn't before, but it's different when almost all these obstacles include members of my family. People who know me understand that my family is my life.

One relative already passed from colorectal cancer. Soon enough I find out that another extremely close relative of mine was diagnosed with type II diabetes mellitus, has emphysema, & has a potential for lung cancer...all of which adds on to his already extremely difficult situation that he is facing as we speak. On top of that, several other members have also discovered that they themselves have acquired certain diseases. This is definitely a challenging time.

Absorbing all of this is very tough. Especially since I myself am kicking my glutes in maintaing my successes in school & in taking care of my own health, since I work out practically everyday & am the healthiest I've ever been in my entire life. How am I supposed to do all of this plus worry about my family's situations?

I'm hanging in there. I'm praying hard.

God works in mysterious ways & despite all of this, I have grown closer to Him & trust that He will eventually lift us up from this rock bottom. Sometimes I may not quite understand His reasons, but I never lose my faith, my hope, & my love for my God.

Let's hope everything will be at peace soon.

'Til next time.

Deuces.

Tuggin' On My Chordae Tendinae

My heartstrings are definitely getting pulled stronger & more frequently than ever lately. Sometimes, I just don't know how much more of it I can take, & WHEN I can finally say what I want to say to certain people, who begin to disappoint me & continue to shorten my patience.

People who truly know me understand that I am a genuinely happy person. I love my life, the people in them, & I am very goal oriented. I have my moods & I have my overly dramatic days. We all do, no matter what people say. All of these are reasons as to why whenever something (whether it be drama, personal issues, conflicts, etc.) arises from a person that is close to me & that I really care about, I'm either there by their side right away, worried & ready to help...or I get disappointed & angry.

As of now, what fits me is the latter of the two. I am very disappointed & quite frankly...I'm angry. An issue regarding a person very close & very important to me has been revealed & it's an extremely upsetting one. People know me as very blunt, outspoke, & honest. And as much as I am desperate & want to tell this person off for their extreme stupidity & mindless actions, I have sworn to secrecy...& it's killing me.

Damn it. I guess for now I have to roll with the punches & bite the bullet. But sooner or later, this issue has to be dealt with. If not by anyone, it will be dealt with by me & heads will definitely roll...metaphorically speaking.

My chordae tendinae are on overdrive. It feels like there is a hand that purposely pulls the strings & adds more to my already full plate. In result of this, I hope that soon enough, they can relax, because they are undoubtedly EXHAUSTED.

Time to study. I've worked out well all week, ate some good food with the family, & has been praying for Uncle Roger.

Spring break is finally here.

'Til next time.

Deuces.


"Cardiology: Chordae Tendinae" by Image Ninja

Adrenaline Rush

"Final Cut" by sendjo
This is my thrill. One day, I'm doing this for a living. No joke. If surgeons can save others like they did for my grandfather when he had his quintuple coronary bypass in 2001, then I want to join them in the ranks.

A Return From the Healing Process

First off, I would like to apologize for my long absence. It's been a challenging few weeks & I haven't had much time to update. Happy belated Easter to you by the way. In a nutshell, let me sum up the events that have taken place since my temporary hiatus...

Academically speaking, I had 2 more anatomy & physiology exams which, thank goodness, I aced despite the fact that they were definitely the most challenging exams I've had so far. I've also continued to keep myself busy with my workout routines (both cardio & resistance) & the numbers thankfully continue to dwindle down into a better & better setting. Furthermore, I've done more successful surgeries on Garfield & worked with a heart...so that made me nerdishly excited.

Besides academics, my life has been driving through some pretty bumpy roads as of late. There's so many people (one in particular) that I miss so very much. There's a divorce going on between two people in my family that I love very much (not my parents just fyi), more bills are piling up & taking a strain on my parents, the job hunt is getting more difficult (even though I have a potential interview coming my way), & my uncle passed away from colorectal cancer the day before Easter. So overall, it's been tough.

This week is dedicated to my Uncle Roger. He's been battling his colorectal cancer for a long time & it took it's toll on him the Saturday before Easter. I was able to see him the night before, & it was painful. He was extremely thin, holding his chest in pain, & was ready to go. I asked him if he was hurting, & he said he was just so tired. I knew it was his time. We all did. Every time he went to sleep, he would see deceased relatives who would tell him to cross-over & join them, most significantly my great-grandmother, Lola Nati. He saw Heaven & it's beauty &, being the naturally funny guy he is, he said the line to Heaven's gate is really long & that he's #500...haha. I'm thankful that he was able to hold on to see the whole family before God called him home. He is definitely someone that will be missed so much & it's going to seem a lot quieter now that he's gone.

What I take pride in the most is the unity of my family & our strength. No matter what happens, we always stand together & support each other. When someone gets sick, we're all there, waiting, praying, & keeping them strong. Even after death, we continue to pray for them & dedicate our days for them. My family is a unit of extreme spiritual strength & that bond will never ever be broken no matter what.

Even in the face of difficulty & sometimes selfishness, we need to realize that no matter how much we love someone, if they want to go & it's their time, then we have to respect & acknowledge that. Even if we keep them here on Earth with us, they will never be the same & will always be in pain. We just need to know that they are finally in a better place with God & will always be watching over us.

I love you Uncle Roger. Rest in peace.

RIP Rogelio de Leon (1939-2010)

'Til next time.

Deuces.

Hot Controversy Strikes America: The Health Care Reform Bill Passes

So it's 3:40 am & I am about to hit the sack. Before I leave however, let me share my thoughts on the biggest issue this week & for weeks (possibly months) to come regarding & involving the very field I'm getting into: the passing of the Health Care Reform Bill in Washington, DC. It's been one of the most heated controversies for a while now, & with it's passing this past Sunday, it just added more heat to the fire.

Now I'm a registered Democrat. However, despite the bill having been won due to a majority vote via the Democrats, I'm kinda in the middle with this. I'm not 100% FOR the bill, while also not being 100% AGAINST the bill. It's a confusing & torn time right now for many who aren't completely pro or con with health care reform.

Let me give a few generalized pros & cons regarding my opinion. I'm not extremely savvy with the political system (like some people that I know), so bear with me.

THE PROS
1) Universal health care to everyone.
2) Affordable insurance will be offered to those who don't have any.
3) Companies & businesses will have the option to either stay with their private insurance (without penalty), or switch/purchase to the new government-regulated insurance...all for the benefits of their employees.
4) Young adults can stay as dependents under their parents' insurance until the age of 26.
5) Insurance companies will not be allowed to turn down applicants with pre-existing conditions.
6) Gives more money to Medicare & Medicaid to expand their help to those less fortunate & the elderly.

THE CONS
1) The cost of this bill will further expand the national debt (about $1.2 trillion more).
2) Not many people know completely what are the details of the bill.
3) It increases taxes as we would have to now pay the government to run their health care insurance, whether or not we already are under a private insurance company.
4) Now that health insurance is essentially available completely (private & government run), people question the constitutionality of the thing as it pretty much requires those without it (families & businesses) to buy insurance or pay a penalty fee.
5) Increased government involvement & control over health care.
6) The additional regulation could potentially increase costs with our current insurance provider.

Overall, those are my general pros & cons. Obviously EVERYONE deserves universal health care, & I think that this bill will finally fulfill that. It could potentially lower medical & healthcare company costs, as the government would be aiding with their budgets & everyone can now have a better chance of affording it, thereby expanding & improving the quality of care. At the same time though, because now government has their control over health care, it could result in increasing taxes, provide penalties for those who REFUSE to buy insurance, & it'll put the government in a shittier debt than it already is.

Who knows. We'll see how the next few weeks/months turn out. I'm in the middle at this point.

'Til next time.

Deuces.

Cirrhosis on St. Patrick's Day

Top o' the mornin' friends. Happy St. Patrick's Day.

So...what is today REALLY all about? In a very general nutshell, today commemorates St. Patrick who famously "drove out the snakes" & brought Christianity to Ireland.

However, how do most people see today? Today is the day where everyone wears green to avoid getting pinched, when those who are of descent take extra pride in being Irish, & of course...when binge drinking reaches an all time high. Not that it doesn't peak on other holidays such as Halloween, Christmas, & New Year's. Just the fact that it's an Irish holiday, people keep the cliche alive & use this day as an excuse for intoxication.

What am I expecting for the rest of today? seeing shamrocks everywhere, the color green in every vicinity, & an influx of drunkards on the streets, getting into accidents, & getting rushed into the ER.

Let's just hope that DOESN'T happen. Cirrhosis is a nasty nasty liver disease. Yes I know, I'm sure many people already have Cirrhosis in some shape or form, but people will use today's holiday as a way to INCREASE/WORSEN this hepatic horror which can lead to total liver failure.

Take care of your livers people. It's more beautiful & important than you would think ;)

Anyways. Enjoy your day, beware of the cliche, wear green & sport your shamrocks.

...& DON'T step on any leprechauns.

'Til next time.

Deuces.


"Shamrock" by mattjenny

Screwed Up Circadian Rhythm...

Daylight Savings Time is not a time of the year that I genuinely favor. Sure, as the name says, we get more daylight. But it screws up my biological clock like crazy. Losing an hour of sleep is one thing I don't enjoy very much, despite the fact that eventually my body will get used to it. I'm not much of a morning person. I should be sleepy by now (since it's 3 am in the morning...even though it's REALLY 2 am), but as the title says...my circadian rhythm is all screwed up. I'm usually a pretty good night owl, but by this time I should be falling asleep. Unfortunately, I'm WIDE awake. Oh well.

As I've mentioned, the only thing about DST that I love is that the sun is out longer. I could still do my running at 6:30 in the evening & the sun will still be out. Going out on weekends is better, so that you can enjoy the extended exposure of daylight. That's pretty much it.

After successfully taking 2 anatomy/physiology exams, watching an unfortunately anticlimactic Pacquiao vs. Clottey fight, spending time with my parents, grandparents, sister, & titas, & eating some great food with the family, the weekend was a very satisfying one. Maybe DST won't be as bad afterall. Hopefully. Eventually my body will settle. It just better settle soon!

Yesterday was also a very special person's birthday & I hope she enjoyed it & was happy. I've said it many times & I'll say it once more...I miss Ephraim & Gomer.

What did YOU do on your weekend? Hopefully it went as well as mine did.

OK! Now my pineal gland is kicking in as we speak & I can finally feel the melatonin working it's magic. That's my cue. Good night world.

Er...should I say good morning? argh.

'Til next time...

Deuces.


"Daylight Savings Time" by xAllifacex

Nervous No More

At last, after a month's worth of time spent on this, we are finally done studying the Nervous System. As much as I absolutely loved learning about the brain, the spinal cord, & everything in between, it pretty much melted my OWN cortex with it's mystery & extreme complexity.

One more lab exam today, the last time I spend dissecting & cutting my sheep brain, & the weekend is finally here.

Plans for next week: Study study study (what else is new?) as we move on to the next systems: Autonomic, Endocrine, Lymphatic, & Immune.

Time to reunite with my old buddy Garfield as I whip out the ol' scalpel to perform surgery on him once more. What's on the hunt this time? nerve plexuses & endocrine organs.

The medical geek in me is jumpin' for joy.

Hope you have a great weekend.

Mabuhay Manny Pacquiao.

Deuces.

The Game of Sparrows

Definitely a stress reliever of mine. When the weeks get crazy & the mind wanders, spending time with my cousins & playing hours of Mah Jong revitalizes my vitals while giving me the chance to bond with my family, reminisce, & laugh like there is no tomorrow. Gathering around that nostalgic, green, square table is a past time of ours that we go to in order to temporarily leave our stresses behind while listening to the clicking of the tiles & anticipating victory. It's a bonding tradition that we've kept for years & will continue to keep forever.

Thank you Mr. Sparrow.

Deuces.

Incisions, Incisions...

My scalpel has worked extra hard this week. My entire dissection kit in fact. Poor brain & soon, cat. Anatomy & Physiology 2B lab this week has been scalpel heavy, with dissecting/investigating brains & histology. Within the next few days, I will be reuniting with my old pal from A&P 2A, Mr. Garfield, & once again perform surgery on the poor feline. The geek in me is ecstatic.

Anways...there are 4 letters in my head that sum up my feelings for today...TGIF.

This week has been an extra busy & eventful one. On top of all my intense studying & working out, I went to a taping of America's Best Dance Crew, donated blood for the 11th time (& feeling amazing), & caught up with some great people.

Certain situations regarding a few relatives also made this week a very difficult one. But all I can do for now is stay in the background where I belong (until I'm needed) & take it one day at a time, while anxiously waiting for updates.

Thank goodness at least I always have a few hours to myself to workout. The past 7 months of consistent cardio (running) & resistance (weights) for an hour & a half to two hours have kept me not only healthy both inside & out (the numbers & compliments have proven it, thank goodness), but also sane. It gives me that time to be in touch with nature & myself.

So finally Friday is here & I am very glad this day has come. I always look forward to Fridays, but today has a slighter better feel to it, as this week has been both rewarding & challenging. The plans for today: whoop out the ol' scalpel once again, cut more brains, volunteer at the hospital, workout & eat no meat.

Let's see what the weekend holds.

In the meantime, enjoy this great photograph of a Friday evening. I find it very sentimental & nostalgic. Do you?

'Til next time.

Deuces.

PS: To my fellow blogger (& amazing person in my life that I miss very much) Ephraim & Gomer...you make my Thursdays extra special with your playlists. I really look forward to them & it's great discovering some songs that are very new to me (minus the classics from this week's playlist lol). I ALWAYS press play & I ALWAYS enjoy :) Thanks for giving me something to look forward to on Thursdays maam. Can't wait to hear more playlists.


"Friday's Sunset" by brandstifterin

Code Blue Part 2...8.8 Strikes in Chile :: My Thoughts.

Another Monday...a new month...a new blog.

First, let me start off my saying that this weekend was truly an uplifting, motivational, & blessed one. Attending CCFC's First Wildfire opened my heart more & it allowed me not just to meet other people, but to also experience an evening filled with touching & emotional worship music, discussion, & just opening my soul to be one with God. It was an amazing experience & one I was glad to be a part of.

Now to my main point. My prayers go out to the people of Chile. Just when we all thought Haiti was enough...another monstrous earthquake strikes, this time in Chile. More of our fellow human beings have been killed because of this. I hope you get the chance to include the Chileans in your prayers & help out via donation if poossible. They really need our help people.

Just last night, me & a group of close friends shared our thoughts on this issue. When the earthquake in Haiti struck, our nation gathered together & donated money, medical supplies, antibiotics...anything & everything. Celebrities even began to open their hearts & gave what they could. And we thought that the worst was over for now. Now that Chile has been affected with an even more powerful quake, what does anyone have left to donate? Is Chile just going to be left in the dust & receive less attention & have less of a national impact like Haiti did?

This is the damn problem with some people. Believe me...I love what our nation has done to help our fellow Haitans. I truly do. But have you ever stopped & thought...how often do we as humans think of others? do we in our lives donate enough or give enough in our everyday lives? In my opinion, many people don't give a damn. Celebrities included. WHY does a natural disaster have to occur in order for people to start thinking of even helping others? WHY do hundreds & thousands have to die in order for money to be shipped out in the millions & telethons to arise? WHY do people donate millions & millions of dollars to other countries when OUR country has people in it that are in terrible shape (financially, medically, etc) yet they receive nothing?

This always gets me. Seeing celebrities give telethons, remaking songs to raise money & awareness, & donating so much money ONLY WHEN huge natural disasters occur irritate me DESPITE how much help it is. It seems to me that alot of them are just doing this as a popularity boost, or a competition of sorts to see who can donate more. Why can't we donate or help others (both here in our country & in other countries as well) everyday or as much as possible?

Now that we've spent so much of our energy to helping our friends in Haiti, can we manage to help our friends in Chile? Will celebrities once again join hands & create another telethon or donate MORE of their money to help out another country in calamity? Will our citizens focus as much attention on Chile as they did on Haiti?

My opinion is, honestly, that Chile may be unfortunately overlooked. Because so much time & energy was given to Haiti thinking this may be the end of it for a while, there is not much left for Chile. And that breaks my heart. It would look extremely bad on our part in the eyes of Chile if we spent so much time & energy on Haiti that Chile receives so much less, almost nothing in comparison to the amount of aid the Haitians received. If I were given the chance, I would LOVE to go on a medical mission to both Haiti AND Chile & other countries in need as well to offer my medical services to help as many people as possible. That would be one dream I would love to fulfill.

Please don't get me wrong on this. I am proud of what our country has done to provide aid. I just wish people could be this active all the time, instead of waiting for a huge disaster to happen & hundreds of lives to be killed in order for that catalyst to spark.

Other countries have experienced extreme natural disasters but receieved absolutely no aid. One primary example: When Typhoon Ondoy hit the Philippines last year, killing hundreds, destroying houses, separating families, & being the worst typhoon the country has experienced (the amount of rainfall in 1 hour was equivalent to 6 months worth of rainfall)...what did the U.S. do to promote for aid or even raise awareness? absolutely nothing. Did celebrities band together? Nope. Do others even know of the severity of that event & how much it effected the country? And the Philippines is one of the U.S.'s biggest allies...How can something like that NOT be a problem?

C'mon now people. Let's start seeing the big picture here. Don't wait for something to happen to take a stand. Be active, be honest, & be consistent. Let it all come from the heart. Let's see how the response to Chile will be like. I'm hoping that it will be as swift & prioritized as Haiti's response was...but then again I won't be surprised if it isn't. Let's MAKE IT HAPPEN.

Life is a sacred gift. And while we still have it, let's do our best to give what we can to others so that they as well can keep that gift. No favoritism or catastrophic event needed to spark that.

I apologize for this extremely long blog. But I hope this got your neurons a-firin'.

'Til next time.

Deuces.

Meet Cortex Man :: The Motor & Sensory Homunculus

I apologize for not blogging in over a week. The studying has been pretty hectic despite my absolute love for anatomy & physiology. Anywho...meet Cortex Man. The figure on your left is the Sensory Homunculus while the figure to your right is the Motor Homunculus. In order for you to understand what in the world these strange looking figures are, a little of neuroanatomy for you. If you took the brain & slice it in such a way that you look at it in a coronal point of view anteriorly (from the front), you will notice 2 equal hemispheres split down the middle via the Corpus Callosum & Longitudinal Fissure. The Precentral/Postcentral Gyrus should be easier to locate with the Central Sulcus as your reference point. These areas control the sensory & motor functions within our bodies.

Now...these figures represent what humans SHOULD look like & how, surprisingly, unproportional our anatomy should be according to what the precentral & postcentral gyri tell us. In the precentral gyrus (motor), certain body parts have a much larger motor area than others. For example, the hands have a HUGE coverage in the precentral gyrus for motor control versus the feet, which have small coverage, as displayed by Mr. Motor Homunculus. In the postcentral gyrus (sensory), the lips & head have a large coverage, therefore Mr. Sensory Homunculus exhibits the large lips & large head. Both models are similar, thus showing that the pre & postcentral gyri are somewhat similar in their motor & sensory control of the body, with some parts being larger or smaller than others.

I'm pretty sure you're lost. And if you're not, congrats. This was just some explanation before I bring up my point. My point in posting this is that Cortex Man (both sensory & motor) got me thinking. Yes yes I know they look pretty ghastly, grotesque & possibly terrifying in physical appearance. BUT if this is how we are supposed to look according to neuroanatomy, how would the world & it's people be to one another?

Would there STILL be discrimination based on looks? would anyone still have their insecurities if we all looked the same? In my opinion, if we all actually turned out the way our brain maps us out, there wouldn't be this competition for looks. Our society now has become so damn conscious over physical appearance & what people "should" look like that millions are overlooked because their physique isn't up to par...whether it involves size, height, facial/bodily beauty, whatever...this in itself causes those extreme insecurities & drive people insane. There are so many beautiful people in this world that are not taken into consideration or judged because of how they look.

Imagine if we all looked like Cortex Man. Despite his strange & awkward appearance, I see it as something unique & quite frankly beautiful in its meaning. If everyone looked the way our neural blueprint maps us & we were all the same...physical insecurity wouldn't exist. We would see others in a different light. Instead of outer beauty or physical appearance, we would all get the chance to know one another based on our hearts & how amazing many of us are on the inside.

No more of that glitz & glamor or judgement & discrimination. Yes it would possibly be quite boring...but our society, in my opinion, would be far more moralistic & everyone could accept others for WHO they are on the inside, NOT what they look like on the outside.

Alas, we are not. We come into this world proportional (most of the time...there are expeptions). Our body parts fit our size & ultimately we do not follow our neural blueprint. Even so, many people are still unsatisfied with how they turn out & do all in their power to alter their appearance via plastic surgery & what not.

Despite what you look like & how your turned out, do your best to accept it & love yourself. Your anatomy is what God gave you & you must take care of it by all means possible. And with that, overlook physical appearance in others & get to know who they are on the inside & see the beauty that lies within their hearts.

I myself have had insecurities with my physique. I've been judged, looked down upon, & overlooked. Yet now, I keep my body & soul active & healthy & day by day, I love & respect myself & my body more :)

As the old saying goes...& I truly believe this...beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.

Thank you Cortex Man.

I hope you learned something new about our amazing brains & gained some insight as well.

'Til next time.

Deuces.

"...And Unto Dust, You Shall Return..."

Today is Ash Wednesday my friends. This day kicks off the season of Lent for Christians. I have to say...this season is always a very enlightening, inspirational, & uplifting experience for me every year. As a devoted Roman Catholic, I find this time one in which I get a chance to re-discover & refresh the true meaning of sacrifice.

Every year during this time, those devoted to this season make a personal sacrifice for 40 days & 40 nights, symbolic of Jesus' 40 days in the desert where He underwent starvation & temptation before His passion. With the tradition of sacrificing something, it brings many closer to their faith. For others, it's merely something that they do due to obligation or to show off.

So many people give up simple things: chocolate, candy, soda, shopping, all that jazz. For me, I give up something personal, usually a bad habit not involving food. This gives me more of a challenge. On top of that, I also start doing something positive I don't usually do very often...to balance it out & make Lent more meaningful to me. It always lifts my spirits & touches me heart when I make my sacrifice complete...then when Easter comes around, it's one of the best days of my year.

Church today was great. But what bugs me the most are the "part-time catholics"...meaning those who show up ONLY for big occasions like Ash Wednesday, Easter, & Christmas & NOT normally every Sunday. They overcrowd the churches & make it uncomfortable & impossible to focus for the actual devotees who go to church every single Sunday. How can some people spend endless hours in the mall or shopping or going out & having a great time...when devoting time for church 1 hour once a week seems impossible? that never became clear to me. In my opinion, there's no excuse for that & frankly I find it shameful.

Anyways...I hope everyone has a good Lent season. For those who follow it, I hope you make this experience a joyous, blessed, & self-discovering one through your sacrifices. Undergoing the temptation & overcoming them will definitely bring you closer to your faith & ultimately closer to God...which IS the ultimate happiness in life.

Deuces everyone. God bless.

Inspiring Food for Thought...& For A Healthy Life.

Happy Valentine's Day everyone. I know a week ago my blog was very scrooge-like in regards to this day. And that maybe this year I may have someone to celebrate it with. Well my friends...this year, I have a valentine once again :) I affectionately call her my wife. She's very special to me.

As I had stated, this blog is reporting to you from San Francisco. The bay area has always been my 2nd home...my home away from home. I have so many relatives up here it's pretty crazy. After a 10 hour drive, stopping at Gilroy, Solvang, & Santa Barbara, all that on-the-road frustration seems so damn miniscule & actually quite ridiculous after you spend quality time with the ones you love...& know deep down in your heart how much they are an inspiration in your life.

Attending my Ate Kay's wedding was probably the best family get together I've had in years with my dad's side. Being able to see everyone altogether for this blessed occasion & of course tear up the dance floor with them was something I can always look back on to keep me going. Seeing old flames rekindle their feelings for one another gave me hope for them. It made me once again acknowledge the fact that I have so many people to be grateful to...as they have been the biggest inspirations to me. Huge occasions like this happen once in a blue moon, that reception in the ballroom was a blast. We all had a little too much wine O_O

My family (both sides) are people I can never take for granted. They have raised me to be who I am. My friends (both past & present) keep me on the ground & are there for me whenever I need them. And of course...goin back to my home away from home in San Francisco & visiting my family always helps me see the beauty in my life & the wonderful people that are in it. They mold me. They move me. They inspire me.

San Francisco itself always gives me a thrill I can't find in very many places. The fact that we come up here so much because of family makes it such a place worth the long drive. Yes it has it's controversies especially with a specific issue of course...but I ignore that fact & make it a special place because of my FAMILY. No matter where I go or end up in life...I will always, as stated by the great crooner Tony Bennett, leave my heart in San Francisco.

Deuces.

ps: A special shoutout to fellow blogger Ephraim & Gomer. I know I've said this, but I again would like to acknowledge the impact alot of your writings have on me. They make me think & they touch my heart. Seriously. Your blogs keep me going & show me that through their simplicity, they hold within them their own moralistic & inspirational treasures that I will always keep very close to me.


GoldenGate Bridge by Millamus

Human Physiology on Valentine's Day & it's "Overrated-ness"

So I know Valentine's Day is still a week away...but this week is going to be pretty hectic so I figured I start my thoughts on it in advance before the craziness & hassles that is expected this week commences. It's that time of year once again...when couples express their love & care for one another, thousands of dollars are spent on gifts here & there, flowers, candy, all that jazz. Soon enough, every corner will be decorated in red, white, & pink...little diapered cupids will be strung up high & imposter looking hearts will be plastered for every eye to see. The body experiences so many physiological changes on that day. The heart races, the brain secretes feel good endorphins, endless hormones are released...everything anatomically & physiologically possible is on OVERDRIVE. The day commemorates St. Valentine, a priest who secretly wed many men & their women that were forced by law to stay single. He sacrificed his life all in the name of one thing...LOVE.

Ok now to reality. Here's my criticism. Call me bitter, a killjoy, heartless...whatever. But I feel that Valentine's Day is so damn overrated. Yes i said it. OVERRATED. For a majority of my life, that day has been meaningless to me EXCEPT for the fact that it's my mom's birthday...so that in itself gives February 14 some significance. But that's it. It makes me cringe when I see couples acting lovey dovey & expressing their undying love in public, waiting 50 billion hours outside restaurants, blah blah blah. I do find it funny, however, seeing the men making last minute trips to buy flowers, candy, bears...you name it.

Now why am I exceptionally Scrooge-like this time of year? I have several reasons why. For one, I find it pretty darn sad that countless couples use this day as the ONLY day to express & show how much they love one another & reveal how much they care. My take on it: Why they hell can't they show it all year round? why do they have to use this 1 day out of 365 days a year to be extra sweet. I find no reasonable excuses on that.

My other reason is the fact that for a majority of my life, I've spent several Valentine's Days alone. It's what they call SAD (Singles Awareness Day). As mentioned previously, the only significance of that day is that it's my mom's birthday. Yes I admit. There WERE some Valentine's Days in my past that had meaning. I had special people that I cared for & some mutually cared back. But nothing really serious or extreme ever happened out of them. Mostly, my heart was ripped out & stepped on. To be frank, it wore me away & I got tired of false hope. That game was too overplayed. Yes you can call it bitterness...but if you weren't in my shoes & haven't experienced this type of pain & loneliness...you can't say squat.

Those are my reasonings. Bitter much? Yes. However, I can't be all unfair about this. I know there are SOME couples out there that show their love all year around...making this day just more special in fairness. And for many women, February 14 is that one specific day out of the year BESIDES their birthday where they can be spoiled by the man in their life. I can't criticize that. But until the day that someone actually proves that they genuinely care for me & whole heartedly loves me as much as I love them & take me for who I am...& this whole fuckin' game is over...& I'll finally have someone to celebrate this day with...Valentine's Day will always be pretty overrated to me.

We'll see how this year goes. Will it be meaningless again or will someone come into my life? As of late, I'm feeling that someone I've been re-igniting that fire with may give it some meaning for me. We'll see where this will take me.

My next update will be coming from San Francisco. Until then my friends...

Deuces.

Go Red for Cardiovascular Disease Awareness Month

February is Cardiovascular Disease Awareness Month. Heart disease is the #1 cause of death in America. Wear red @ least once a week this month to raise awareness, to show support for those who are suffering or have suffered from it, & in memorial for loves ones who have died from it. In January 2001, my grandpa suffered from 2 massive heart attacks & SURVIVED Quintuple Coronary Bypass Surgery.

It was nothing short of a miracle...the beauty & miracles that can occur with medicine & prayer.

Take care of your hearts people. We only get 1. Raise awareness. Be inspired. Be active. And be motivated to take care of those precious pumps that keep us alive.

Deuces.

Peace of Mind

Surprisingly, the past week since my previous blog has proven to be an unexpectedly peaceful & satisfying one. No really. Usually, my weeks lately have brought on spurts of stress & have definitely set my id on a joyride, as mentioned in last tuesday's blog, mostly due to financial burdens & other things here & there. That's been the norm lately.

Thankfully, this past week has given me less stress & has increased satisfaction & peace of mind in my life. Here's the general breakdown of why...& yes, this will be in a numbered fashion:

1) I paid off my fees on thursday, which always brings relief.

2) That same day, my professor told me I definitely have a spot in her anatomy & physiology 2 course, finally giving me the chance to finish the 2 sem. series. It's super difficult to get into this class.

3) On saturday, my family & I attended a big family surprise party...the first of the year thereby reuniting with family that I haven't seen in a while.

4) I was spoiled to death by my rich tita from san francisco.

5) I've gotten more compliments about how I look now due to me losing weight.

6) I've been firming up & dropped 9 pounds in 5 days (in a healthy way of course) & other numbers are showing success.

7) I finally have more money to pay for textbooks EARLY.

As you can see, everything that's happened this week has made me really happy & brought alot of serenity & peace. Family reunions, guarantees into needed courses, long awaited compliments about my physique that I've worked extremely hard for...what more could I ask for. Definitely a big sigh of relief for my brain, heart, & kidneys O__O

Hopefully, the next few days will bring about more positives & rule out the negatives that usually drag me to the bottom.

The next big anticipation besides school: my cousin's wedding in the bay area. And I can't wait to reunite with more family & dance like there's no tomorrow :)

'Til next time my friends. Deuces.

Overly Id :: The Attempt to Balance the Id, Ego, & Superego

Honestly now...I truly hate my id. If there was medication specifically targeting & inhibiting one's id, I'd be an addict. One resolution for this year that I'm willing to share: the attempt to balance my id, ego, & superego. If one is confused about the terminology just given, here's some general insight. In psychology, Sigmund Freud categorized the human personality into 3 forms: the id, ego, & superego.

The id is one's raw instinct. Their negative side. Their darker side that craves satisfaction of all forms & exhibit jealousy, anger, pride, selfishness, revenge, etc. The ego is one's perfectionist side. The side that seeks 100% & positivity. It is the exact opposite of the id & tells one to be moral. Thus, it feels guilt the most when perfection & morality are not successful. The superego is the mediator between the id & ego. It is the one that uses common sense & enforces which between the two is more practical during a certain event & is more in contact with the external environment. Think of the old school cartoons: one's conscience with the little angel on one shoulder (ego), the little devil on the other (id), & the person in the middle (superego).

Back to me now. In general, my personality normally exhibits the id, ego, and superego equally. However, it's obvious that when problems & issues arrise, I tend to be id-dominant. My instincts take over. I want those who mess with me to feel it. Sometimes, common sense & trying to do the right thing is hard to grasp. And I despise it. I get angry & bitter & "sungit" (tagalog for "moody"). I can say things...irreversible things...that I would regret, & it'd be too late. I hate it primarily due to the fact that sometimes, I can't control it. Emotions of anger & bitterness take over & the worst part: loved ones take notice. When I'm angry...I get really ANGRY. I don't want my ego & superego to be overtaken & eventually be diminished by the id.

I'm doing my best to control it. I'm trying hard to bite this tongue of mine that can talk alot of shit & has the potential to hurt others. Regrettably, I've already hurt a few because of it but luckily, many of them have come back & have forgiven me. I don't want want my id to do something I will regret again. As of late, I'm having a hard time trusting someone extremely close to me & I don't want to look at this person under a bad light, & vice versa. This should not happen under any circumstances.

Right now, I'm praying that God can help control this part of me & give me the strength to call my superego to the rescue when my id is on the rise, to control it, & to bring me back to common sense. So far, this is the hardest task & resolution that I've ever attempted.

Don't get it twisted. I'm still the same old me. I truly love my family & friends & I'm still generous, helpful, a listener, & a shoulder to cry on when someone needs me. I give off love & normally happiness. But in the words of the Incredible Hulk...don't make me angry...you wouldn't want to see me when I'm angry...& when that does happen...I NEED HELP.

PQRST vs. αβδθ

Ok so it's been a week & I start off with such a strange blog post title? Let me explain. PQRST refers to the peaks of an EKG & αβδθ refers to the various peaks of alertness of an EEG. Basically, analysis of the heart (EKG) & the brain (EEG). Metaphorically speaking, the point of this blog is to analyze which is of more importance...logic or emotion?

The reason for me writing about this is due to specific events that have occured in my life this past week. Long story short: do I let my emotions take over? or am I an overly analytical person? After some thought, I've concluded that I'm dead center. With certain things, I tend to think way too much & may prevent myself from an opportunity or a great time. With other things, my heart takes the reigns & I feel myself taking things too seriously or fall for idiotic foolishness with total spontaneity, with the potential of making situations worse. Both have their disadvantages, but at the same time also have big positives.

Sometimes, just listening to your heart & doing things without over thinking the fear can bring huge success, as I've experienced. At the same time, it can also be a great advantage to use your brain, to not always be spontaneous, & to think things through, to prevent the worst from happening. The brain & the heart are an everlasting, unbreakable team. They are dynamic in what they do to the human soul & need each other. The brain THINKS while the heart FEELS.

The brain KNOWS things that the heart doesn't, while the heart FEELS things the brain doesn't. It's important to balance both & to be in peace with both. You can't live with just one or the other. It's like asking if water or air is more important. Impossible to answer.

Always cherish & take care of these sacred treasures you carry with you your entire life, & balance out the control, to have a satisfying & happy life.


"Hearts Oil Brain Fuel" by Fealasy

EMERGENCY MEDICINE NEEDED STAT...Code Blue in Haiti

On January 12, an intense 7.0 magnitude earthquake shook Haiti, with it's epicenter in the country's capital, Port-au-Prince. Countless buildings have fallen...houses have been destroyed...roads have collapsed...& many hospitals have been obliterated. As many as 3 million people have been affected by this tragedy, & over 500,000 men, women, & children have been reported dead.

What I consider to be the worst & scariest news in this situation is that the places the people need most at this moment - the hospitals & medical centers - have been engulfed by the quake. I can't fathom & grasp the idea of not having the facility that provides healing, care, & overall protection for the severely injured & sick. Not having the healers (nurses, doctors, surgeons, etc) to run to gives everyone a loss of hope.

The Doctors Without Borders Donation Fund is working it's hardest to bring some light back to Haiti. By clicking on the picture above, you can donate some $$$ that will go straight into support for sending emergency medical care & medicine, which are now almost non-existent, to the people who have suffered through this. Anything helps. Please help if you can.

Lord, protect the people of Haiti. Through this extremely frightening event, many have lost their loved ones & have therefore lost hope. Strengthen the people & let them see that the world is at their side & working as hard as possible to provide aid & hope. Bring the light back into the people's eyes & help them rebuild their country & their hearts.

Thank you all.

Patience For Patients In Hospital Beds

One of the worst places to be forced confinement in is a hospital bed. Limited movement...limited space....limited privacy. Stuck in a small dark room with PICC IV lines & CVC IV lines pricked into your veins, where all around you, visions of medical equipment, an overhead table, a curtain, & a possible neighbor run wild in the cerebrum making one wonder when they will finally be discharged & be back in the comfort of their own home. No wonder most patients are anxious, nervous, grumpy, & even angry when encountered.

The main departments I rotate working around at CRMC (minus the lobby) are mainly ICU/PCU & Surgery. I truly love working on those floors. Meeting & becoming close to the staff & patients make my day. However, there are many days where I encounter patients that woke up on the wrong side of the bed & exhibit a grouchy, very angry sort of temperament, understandably of course. Most of the time, I bite my tongue & still give off a smile & assist them as much as I can. Other times, I feel like yelling back, but STILL I bite my tongue for the sake of professionalism & social etiquette. After taking moments to myself, I try to understand their moods. Afterall, they ARE confined in a very unpleasant place.

This past friday, I encountered a patient in surgery that really touched my heart. He was about late 40's-early 50's in age with alot of pain. He wreaked of alcohol & cigarettes & possibly urine. It was almost unbearable. His dx: severe cirrhosis with abdominal ascites. His only visitor: his younger brother. Usually, patients in this much pain are obviously not in the best of moods. However when I approached him, he had a painful smile on his face & asked me how I was doing. Upon asking him how he was coping, he looked at me & said "Not good at all...but hangin in there", still with a smile on his face. His brother (on crutches by the way) looked at me, crying, & expressed how much he loved his brother, that he would not leave his side for even a second, and that he needed help STAT.

It was obvious they were roughin' it & were not well off. Both had very ragged clothing, carried nothing but backpacks & said that they had no car & walked around the city alot. They have gone through so much together, yet still show love for one another & for a simple stranger (yours truly). It amazed me how much he made a terrible & life-threatening situation at a traumatizing place a positive one. That doesn't happen often.

It made me think...how can thousands of us who are well off be stressed out & bitch over the smallest things in life when some people who are off much much worse than us are more positive? How can thousands of us sometimes show no affection to our relatives when these two brothers going through hell show more love & support to each other than I've seen in a long time? As I conversated with him for a bit, I decided to take my leave & move on to the next patient. When I left, he shook my hand & said "God bless you...thank you for everything".

I see so many patients at the hospital. Most are grateful & give their "thank yous", which make me feel satisfied. Rarely do I encounter ones that truly touch my heart. Only a few have. This poor guy definitely did. Many who work with PATIENTS lose their PATIENCE & often end up judging them. I learned something after meeting this man: to have more patience & to show more love & kindness for people, as he did for me.

I left his hospital bed & proceeded to the next patient, with a heart full of happiness & love.


"Your Hospital Bed" by Emo Cuddly Bear